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Working with couples is a joy for me because I believe that in every relationship, there is an opportunity for healing.
We are attracted to what we know or what was familiar growing up. Some traits in our partner are positive and can heal us, but the negative ones can amplify dysfunction if they are not identified in the relationship. If we neglect to address it, then we open ourselves up to emotional abuse and possibly, an escalation into physical abuse.
Some of the negative traits often hit us like a ton of bricks. We did not think that wedded bliss included being caught off guard with a stinging remark, unnecessarily triggering and perpetuating trauma from the past. In this decision-making moment, we either: a.) allow this dynamic to create such strife that we end the relationship OR
b.) seek counseling to uncover the psychological intricacies that are preventing growth in the relationship and discover how the two of you can heal one another.
If we take a good look at this dynamic, we then begin to realize more about unmet needs or in some cases, emotional wounds, from our childhood. So, the goal in couple's therapy is to identify, nurture and receive those needs from your partner, so YOU can heal and truly become who you were meant to be in the world; freely giving your gifts and inherent talents to others and yourself.
I believe our lives have meaning, and our goal is to live up to our full potential. With couple's or even individual counseling, this can be achieved--with wonderful results!
NOTE: If there is physical abuse or severe emotional harm inflicted, each partner will be seen individually until it is appropriate and safe for couples therapy to commence.
If you are having difficulty with your partner, please call (217) 544-0388.
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